It was a late April spring morning in Switzerland. Colder than you want it to be, but still noticeably warmer than a few weeks prior. Normally I wake up for breakfast at 7am and then have some free time afterwards, which I’ve been trying to use for exercise. That Wednesday morning, I decided to skip breakfast all together and go for a fun bike adventure before a day of lectures in a classroom started. Adventure indeed is what I got, but fun, not so much.

I didn’t have an exact plan for where to bike, I just like to come up at each turn and decide in the moment which direction to take. I came under an underpass, and could’ve turned right and gone the familiar route, or stayed straight and go into the unknown one. Well, I chose to go straight, out of curiosity to where it would lead. After only a few minutes of riding I recognized where I was, and excitedly grabbed my phone out of my pocket to film the beautiful mountain landscape, naturally so I could post it on Instagram for the whole world to see. (If you want to see the video footage I got my fall on tape, so reach out to me directly to see it lol).

I have biked and used my phone lots of times before, no problem; it’s always a risk but I didn’t think twice about it this time around. But as I was distracted by trying to fit the French Alps into my tiny little screen, what I failed to see right in front of me was that I was going down a hill.  Next thing I know, I’m in mid-air, thinking: “welp…this is gonna be bad, why did I do such a stupid thing?”

I was thrust from the front of the bike into the street, arms forward & skidding down the road.  For once I was thankful that it was cold, because I was wearing my winter coat and gloves which protected me from getting hurt more than I should’ve. My first thought as I landed on the ground and bounced back to my feet was a genuine thank you God.  Although I was in pain and cut myself on my hand and hips and ripped my jacket, I knew right away that I got away way less hurt than I should’ve been. I was definitely dizzy though, and as I stood up, everything went white in my vision and my legs went weak and I collapsed on the street again. A good Samaritan (pun intended as this week Samaritan was one of the terms we had to define) pulled over and got out of her car to help me up, right before a bus came barreling by. She kept asking if I was okay, but I didn’t know what to say. I had such a delayed reaction because I was in shock, and my hearing disappeared for about 15-20 seconds.

I ended up leaving my bike on in the woods nearby and the woman drove me back to base. I was still in delayed reaction mode and was in pain, but I was so presently aware of God’s protection over me in the whole scenario. I got back to base and my friends and leaders immediately came to my help, and even went back to get the bike for me. Once I got some food and water in my system, I was much better and was able to walk around more normally. It was at this point I realized that I wasn’t even wearing a helmet that whole time. Not because I didn’t want to, but because I genuinely forgot to put one on.

Shock eventually transitioned into shame of my own stupidity and pride.  Knowing full well that this was a quintessential scenario where “pride comes before the fall”.  But at the same time in awe that despite my sin staring at me in the face, God still so evidently protected me. My brain ocellated between these two trains of thought, but not fully able to process either one. So, I chose to distract myself with the thoughts and concerns from those around me, instead of ones of my mortality and standing before God.

As the day went on and shame deepened within me, some lyrics by John Mark Pantana kept popping into my head to add to the mix of thoughts and emotions going on:

Even on my worst day, You’re right there with me.  

To be honest, I couldn’t even remember which song it came from at the time, but that bridge would not get out of my head.

Even on my worst day, You’re right there with me.  

I wouldn’t say it was my worst day, but it was a pretty rough day, mostly mentally.  I could definitely say it was my worst day in Switzerland since arriving there a few weeks prior.

Fast forward to the afternoon, after lectures and lunch were finished. The whole base (students in all 5 schools & staff) broke into mixed groups to head to different locations nearby Lausanne.  Even though the whole base was going, I debated skipping because I was still feeling a bit off and walking was kind of hard. But I figured laying in my bed wouldn’t do much to help, either, so I went.

Our group went to downtown Lausanne, praying in various parts of the city for healing, revival, families, etc. I’m still learning to value prayer before taking action steps, but my natural tendency is to want to just act, sometimes without thinking (aka why I fell off my bike). Nonetheless, I had it on my heart to step out and pray for someone, but the right opportunity just didn’t seem to come by. 

That week we were studying the gospel of Mark, and I couldn’t stop thinking about Jesus and the disciples healing the sick, cleansing lepers, casting out demons & raising the dead. I wasn’t ready to raise the dead, but I was ready to pray for someone to be healed! It’s taken me years to get to the point of believing that Jesus still heals and still does miracles today, but now I truly do believe that Jesus has given his authority to his disciples to continue doing the work that he began 2000+ years ago. But our time passed, and the right opportunity to step out in boldness to pray for someone didn’t really seem to come up. My brain yet again began to oscillate between thoughts of apathy to shame of failure. 

But as our group headed to the van to return to base, a man sitting on a bench right next to the staircase to get down to the garage cried out to one of my colleagues, David. I was about to head down the stairs, but stopped when I saw them talking. The man’s name was Daniel, and he could hear that we were English speakers and asked if we knew someone specific named Tara. Apparently she gave him a home remedy but he was missing some of the ingredients and wanted to know what they were. We couldn’t help him out with Tara, but we asked him what he was sick with to see if we could help him out in any other way.

It turned out that he got diagnosed with HPV a week before, and basically he was desperate to be cured. We told him we weren’t medical specialists, but that we believe that Jesus can heal him, and offered to pray for him.  He reacted by telling us that he had rejected Jesus many times in the past; that his sister is a Christian and tried to bring him to church many times, but he always said no and didn’t want anything to do with it.  But he also said that he believed the reason he was sick was due to the very fact that he had been rejecting Jesus. So we asked again if he actually wanted us to pray for his healing and he enthusiastically said, “Yes!”

So we prayed for Daniel, reassuring him that even though he has rejected Jesus many times in the past, Jesus has not rejected him and still loves him so much and wants to heal him.  After praying, I felt the Holy Spirit nudge me to ask him if he believed he was healed, which is not exactly something that you can tell right off the bat in his situation. Daniel’s immediate response was “I know I was healed!”.  Both David and I were amazed at this man’s faith, and just the way events were unfolding so unexpectedly.

He proceeded to talk again about how he had rejected Jesus many times in the past, but now he was ready to receive him. It may seem obvious that the next step would be to ask if he wanted to receive Jesus, but something like this had never happened to me before, where it was so surprising and unexpected, and in a way handed on a silver platter to us to help facilitate. Again, it took a distinct nudging from the Holy Spirit to get the courage to ask him if he wanted us to help him receive Jesus right then and there. And he eagerly said, “Yes! I am ready to receive Jesus!”.

So we helped guide him in a prayer to accept Christ into his heart. I didn’t really know what I was saying, but the great part of all of this was that it was all so divinely appointed by the Holy Spirit and He works beyond human capacity; actually works best in human weakness.  

When we finished there was something noticeably different in his face and eyes, and when we told him that, he said he could feel it.  I actually felt like I was going to cry tears of joy. It was such a crazy, unexpected 15 minutes. Everyone else was in the van and had no idea what was going on. But in those 15 minutes a man was healed and became a follower of Jesus. It was like something straight out of the gospels:

“’What do you want me to do for you?’ Jesus asked him.  The blind man said, ‘Rabbi, I want to see.’ ’Go,’ said Jesus, ‘Your faith has healed you.’ Immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus along the road.” (Mark 10:51-52).

I believe that Daniel’s faith healed him. That he encountered Jesus, which is what made him immediately follow Him. He didn’t have to go into a church to be healed or to meet Jesus. Jesus met him where he was at.    

Before departing ways, I felt nudged by the Holy Spirit yet again, this time to ask if I could hug him. He hesitated and took a step back and said that his doctor told him that he shouldn’t shake hands with anyone because of his condition. I realized that this man was like a modern day leper. Lepers in the bible didn’t all necessarily have leprosy, but it was the term used for someone who had a skin disease of any sort, and who were exiled from the community, marked as “unclean” from the rest of society until they were better. Daniel even said that he hadn’t even told his sister about his diagnosis because he was too ashamed.

I used to wonder why there was a difference in language used when Jesus healed someone sick vs. made a leper clean.  Why wouldn’t they just say he healed a leper? But it’s because there was the shame of being “unclean” and social ostracization attached to leper’s situation, not just the physical ailment. Therefore when Jesus would touch a leper, he not only cured them, but made them “clean”, and therefore acceptable to return to being a part of normal society.

A leper came to him begging him, and kneeling he said to him, “If you choose, you can make me clean.” Moved with pity, Jesus stretched out his hand and touched him, and said to him, “I do choose. Be made clean!” Immediately the leprosy left him, and he was made clean. 

(Mark 1:40-42).

So, what is more accurate of what happened to Daniel in this encounter was that Jesus made him clean. He not only cured him of his cancer, but awakened his soul, and removed his shame so he can be reconciled to his family.

Of course, this take faith on our end to believe and trust God for, too. Faith that he truly is healed; faith that he did accept Jesus and his life really will be transformed; faith that he would follow through on that phone call to his sister, who had been fasting for him at that very point in time. Faith to believe that the entire encounter was divinely appointed, and it was all done through the power of the Holy Spirit, and nothing according to our own strength or ability. Faith enough to hug him despite his doctor’s orders.

It was all such an unexpected, almost surreal experience.  As God made Daniel clean from shame that day, He also made me clean from mine. The shame of my fallings and failures and sins and blatant weaknesses. This story really goes to show that God doesn’t disqualify us for our sins, but He actually loves to use us all the more when we are weak. A reminder that I don’t have to have it “all together” for God to still want me, and work through me.

Even on my worst day, You’re right there with me.

It really is true that God’s strength is more easily seen in times of weakness (2 Corin 12:9). Such a paradox. God’s way of doing things is full of paradoxes. In 4 weeks of studying the Bible now, I can’t say that I can comprehend God more, but I actually understand Him less, and have to lean less and less on my own understanding, but more on trusting in His sovereignty and goodness and kindness and love. I’ve got 8 more weeks to go, so we’ll see what other unexpected adventures and lessons I learn between now and then.  In the meantime, pray for Daniel!!